ded

tootles.

2003-10-03T02:44:55Z

so this is about all i've got to say.

a little song for all you LJ'ers who've noted me an read my LJ through the months.
'Goodbye LiveJournal' sung to the tune of 'Goodbye Cruel World' by Pink Flod, from the sensational album, The Wall.

"Goodbye, LiveJournal,
I'm leaving you today.
Goodbye, goodbye, goodbye.

Goodbye all you people,
There's nothing you can say,
To make me change my mind.
Goodbye."

twas nice knowin all ya. Blessings.
signing off.
~Casey

dedpoetic @ 2003-09-25T22:23:00

2003-09-26T03:24:53Z

i have a great job making good money.
i have a great place to live with cheap rent.
i have musicians to jam with.
i'm surrounded by positive, Godly, awesome people.

so why am i so lonely?
~Casey

something written a while ago

2003-09-25T02:58:00Z

"you make me hate every moment ive been alive...
...cause i didnt spend all of it loving you"

why do i want this so bad
yet not allow myself to give in?
i know htis hurt will resurface even though all is forgiven
my heart says i still want you
still need you
and you're still the only one who makes me smile

what would i give to hold you
so close like i always dreamed
to hear those words
softly whispered in my ear
to have your face inches from mine
staring into eyes that last forever
that reach to depths i've never seen

"that's awesome. i'm happy for you."

so let's talk
let's write
let's forget all about this fight
well i'm not sure
if that's something i can do
when all i'm left holding
is less than a piece of you

"Pack it up boys, we're pulling out / of this hellhole and all it stands for / how could I ever really begin / to say I'm sorry to you"

the sweetness

2003-09-09T02:11:18Z

so i'm all settled in and got the net back up. i know all of you were fretting because i never update :-D
anyway, life is going good, i'm working insane hours sometimes, but it's all good, i enjoy the paychecks. so yeah, i have 444 playsw on mp3.com... sweet!
anyway, that's it for me. boo yah.
~Casey

dedpoetic @ 2003-07-30T00:20:00

2003-07-30T05:20:26Z

jemmifer, i owned you! :-D
~Casey

poll

2003-07-30T01:16:57Z

i broke 400 plays on my mp3 website, and to celebrate i'm gonna upload 3 new songs. if you haven't checked out the ones up there, DO IT NOW!!! muahahaha
anyway, i want to let you, my faithful readers decide which new ones go up...
so if you want to vote on which three you'd like to hear, stick the numbers of the songs in the comment box.
1. still left with that taste in my mouth - a brooding, dark song about questioning your faith. a nice melodic out break in the middle.
2. so this is life - my 'sell out' song. a sad sounding 'pop' song about life's trials and temptations.
3. can i ever forget? - a cool electronic track, reminiscent of NIN/ a bit dark sounding. (instrumental)
4. die like Van Goh (alone) - a song about being alone (instrumental)
5. hope - a nice simple melodic electronic song. i utilized a bunch of acoustic drums in it to make it sound more organic and less electronic. (instrumental)
6. time to forget - calm, mostly guitar driven. (instrumental)
7. i miss you (voice version) - an acoustic number written for a girl i was dating. i gave this to her on her birthday, after removing the weird clip in the background. (instrumental)
8. the flexing glass - a friend of mine asked me "Is this static x?" to which i kindly replied "No, that's me." my first attempt at the 'dueling guitars' sound.

so there ya have it. take your pic, and which ever 3 get the most votes i'll post. thanks and God bless
~Casey

dedpoetic @ 2003-07-29T15:58:00

2003-07-29T21:01:04Z

there are few things in this world that are worse than an artist with no ambition.
i mean really. i don't have the ambition to do art. so really i don't have much ambition to do anyhting. cuz i don't do anyhting but art. heh. oh geez
~Casey

please tell me you're joking

2003-07-29T03:43:04Z

falling upon deaf ears ~as i lay dying
the sound of silent voices surveying my thoughts
regularity defining perfection
neither sorrow nor contentment
whispering emptiness, frail words collapse
my weight only stirs the ground
how long can i hold your hand as you walk over graves
you search for tears of compassion
yet find the comfort of winter
reassurance dead like the falling leaves
losing hope in your unchanging ways
all of my strength cannot save you
if you are unwilling to help yourself

i was walking across the street and saw the carcass of a dead bird smashed into the road

2003-07-23T22:51:34Z

and thought it odd... hte symbolism...
"are not two sparrows sold for a penny? Yet not one of them will fall except for the will of the Father." that's a verse talking about how God takes care of us, but it's also funny because i put to death a lot of things today.
i went through my trunk that i use as a coffee table. it's one my grandma gave me quite a few years back. it's where i keep a lot of letters, cards, nic-nacs and miscellaneous junk. in it was a cookie tin, filled with old letters, all from old girlfriends/friends that i've mostly lost contact with. there must have been about 100 letters in there, and i read alomst every single one. it took me around 2 1/2 hours. after i read them, i promptly proceeded to throw them away. it felt good, seeing as how most of those letters were from extremely juvenile and dramatic situations, and most of them were before God radically changed my life. so i let go of a lot of htings today. it still feels werid, but it felt good.
Now, the girl i dated 8 times on seperate occasions, my first kiss, the one i was going to marry, is nothing but memories. She hasn't contacted me in over 2 years. I've tried countless times to get in touch with her, driving through her town on my way to Billings, calling, emailing. nothing but errors for disconnected numbers and unanswered letters. anyway, so i'm feeling a bit strange now, and reminiscent and i hope it passes, because it's not too much fun to think of things that could have been and to still want them to sometimes be that way. yet i still know better, i wouldn't give anything to feel the way i did back then.
::end pointless post::
but it is after all, MY livejournal... ;)
God bless you all.
~Casey

boo yah!

2003-07-21T21:10:07Z

WHO HAS 402 PLAYS ON THEIR MP3.COM SITE???????????????
ME, THAT'S WHO!
can ya FEELIT?
UH!
~Casey

oh wow...

2003-07-18T21:59:43Z

LyricalSuSpecT21: im goneeeeeeeeeeee
LyricalSuSpecT21: lomao
mybr0k3Nw1nGz: lol
mybr0k3Nw1nGz: who dis?
LyricalSuSpecT21: suspect
LyricalSuSpecT21: cs
LyricalSuSpecT21: counter strike
LyricalSuSpecT21: ahhaha
LyricalSuSpecT21: I can type when im drunk
LyricalSuSpecT21: aahahahaha
LyricalSuSpecT21: this is so nice
mybr0k3Nw1nGz: uh ok
LyricalSuSpecT21: did u c the elephant @ utr hose
LyricalSuSpecT21: ?
LyricalSuSpecT21: ahahhaa
LyricalSuSpecT21: its pissing on u mom
LyricalSuSpecT21: ahahahaa
mybr0k3Nw1nGz: wow, that was a profound statement

uh... i don't really know what to say. that was pretty funny. lol
~Casey

dedpoetic @ 2003-07-15T23:20:00

2003-07-16T04:23:28Z

woo. update
check out my mp3.com site
www.mp3.com/the_faceless
see that pimp drawing in the corner? yeah it was done by this awesome friend of mine,

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woo. update
check out my mp3.com site
www.mp3.com/the_faceless
see that pimp drawing in the corner? yeah it was done by this awesome friend of mine, <a href"http://nancy0.deviantart.com/">jenna</a>. she kicks butt.
and SARAH emailed me!
*does a happy dance*
and i'm moving to cedar rapids, iowa!!! *does a happier dance*
life is good. i can't wait to get out of South Dakota.
god bless
~Casey

dedpoetic @ 2003-07-01T19:37:00

2003-07-02T02:39:45Z

"i finally found that life goes on without you
and the world still turns when you're not around"
anberlin -'naive orleans'

amen to that.
~Casey

dedpoetic @ 2003-06-20T22:14:00

2003-06-21T03:23:36Z

just got home from junior high camp! being a counselor is so much fun. i love the jr. high kids so much because they have so much energy and mostly show alot of repsect for their counselors and stuff... not so much the sr. high kids, plus they're so dramatic... anyway. i met some girls fro North Central University in minneapolis. they were their telling people about college and were counselors for junior high camp. they were some cool people.
jessi- she was the girls counselor for our team (the BLUE team baby!). she was a cool chick, and held her breath under water for 1:40 during a breath holding contest for rec time at camp. wow. that's insane.
rachel- she's just cool. she was really sociable and had a great sense of humor. she was (i think) a junior in college and had never had a boyfriend in her life.
sara(h)- casey has a crush. 'nuff said. <3
i gave all three of them my email address, i hope they stay in touch. they were all really cool.
other than that it was an awesome time hanging out with the kids. my worship band played worship for all the night services, and that was really awesome. we like to rock our songs out pretty hard, and i think the kids really liked the energy we had. we got many compliments and it was really refreshing to see something so positive. a lot of things around this town are so dead, it was great to see some life for a change. something positive. anyway, that's about it for me. time to go and be lazy and stuff.
~Casey

wee hoo! i'm naked!

2003-06-10T20:40:17Z

ok, not really.
so get this. my computer gets a nasty virus. casey backs up stuff, and reformats.
casey gets back up on the net with a clean install of windows 98 and updates Norton Antivirus and guess what? THE VIRUS APPEARS AGAIN!!! it's in the update for my ANTIVIRUS program. how gay is that? so now i have a 20 pound paperweight until i can replace my now fried harddrive. the past few days have not been fun technology-wise. so if i haven';t replied to emails or seemed to have dropped off the face of the planet, that's why. so, here i go. anyone got explosives? my computer needs to be blowed up.
~Casey

heavy sighs and turning stomachs

2003-05-28T17:37:56Z

my stomach has been turning all day...
i'm really worried about sarah. she's been seeing this kid who's into drugs and drinking. i know she hasn't been to church in like 6 months..
i hate this. why does it seem that everyone i care about is turning their back on God? it makes me sad... and it makes me scared. some of these people that i admired most, spiritually, just walk away. people that seemed to have more faith than me. and i wish i could say i was stronger than that. i wish i could say that i knew my faith would carry me through and that i would come out the other side ok, faith in-tact. but i can't. there's no certainties for me, because i am human. the only thing i can do is keep digging as hard as i can into God and hoping against all hope that the faith He has given me won't fail me. i know God would never fail me. but i know that my flesh is weak. God help me... help us all.
~Casey

would everyone hated me if i started a glam rock band?

2003-05-27T01:41:35Z

haha
it's funny... the bands i want to start... one would have to be a shoegazer/glam mellowed out band, and the other would have to be insane and technical metalcore. i think for the metalcore band i'd be more of a band whore than anyhting. not really writing a whole lot, just in the background playing guitar. but the glam/shoegazer would be all me.
i'm a strange cookie, i think.
anyone want to make some techno?
~Casey

dedpoetic @ 2003-05-22T22:22:00

2003-05-23T03:23:10Z

WhisperAshes: So what do you wanna talk about.
mybr0k3Nw1nGz: spoons.
mybr0k3Nw1nGz: do you eat cereal with a big spoon or a little spoon?
WhisperAshes: good for eating?
WhisperAshes: lol
mybr0k3Nw1nGz: haha
WhisperAshes: little usually lol
WhisperAshes: what about yourself lol
mybr0k3Nw1nGz: if my mouth were big enough, i'd use a cooking spoon
WhisperAshes: lol
mybr0k3Nw1nGz: i'm not kidding
mybr0k3Nw1nGz: i'd shovel that stuff in somethin fierce lol

just thought i'd share that.
so what's YOUR take on spoons?
you like big ones or little ones?
~Casey

too good, too good...

2003-05-23T00:46:15Z

this was too great to not post.
www.disasse,blance.com
as if the world needs ANOTHER webcomic haha...
God bless
~Casey

wee hoo!!!

2003-05-15T18:01:30Z

301 plays bay-bee!
i broke 300. i rules
*dances like a monkey*
~Casey

lunch break

2003-05-12T17:35:37Z

i'm on lunch break from work. yeeeee haw. i'm going back for another hour today after lunch. i usually only work until 12, but there's a few things that need to be done and i need to get the scaffolding i use out of the way for the other guys. i figured i'm not doing anything productive, or wouldn't, anyway. i ned to pay bills. and work on my website. and work on the youth group's website. ah the joys of being computer-savvy, everyone wants a website. bah. anyway, that's it for me. gonna go check the new strong bad and snag a nap. god bless
~Casey

in the quiet i can feel the fire

2003-05-10T02:10:22Z

i am so bored and lonely. someone come and keep me company. call me. im me. anything. bah.
i have almost no friends here. there's chris, that's about it. he's more of a mentor relationship though... plus i have things i need to do. i don't know if you still read this or not, but i miss you. i miss 5 am phonecalls and laughing hysterically and being totally open and honest with at least someone... sometimes it seems like i can't be real with anyone anymore.
i'm going to go pray.
~Casey

cerebral aneurysm. leave me paralyzed, love. leave my hypnotized, love.

2003-05-08T04:03:10Z

you're the caller
you're the movement and the spin
never
could it stay with me then

fade with consequence
lose with eloquence
and smile
you're not in this movie
you're not in this song
never
leave me paralyzed love
leave me hypnotized love

a lady died today of an aneurysm. my bible stuy group got the news as one of the girls walked in late and told us. it made us all feel sad and made me think about how fragile life is. an aneurysm can kill someone in under five minutes. boom. gone. facing the judgment seat of God. and that's it.
what will you do with your life? you'd better make it count. it made me think so much about how there are so many people i have yet to witness to. to tell them about the love and saving grace of christ. so anyone who reads this, let me tell you, if you'll listen. it's so weird how a community of online virtual strangers can mean so much to me, but you all do. i love you all and love reading your insight and seeing your lives unfold. it gives me a glimpse into someone else's life, sometimes self-censored, sometimes not. and it's because i love you all so much that i must say this:
Christ is the only way to heaven.
the bible says that no one gets to the Father except through the son. romans 10:9 states that if you believe in your heart that God raised Jesus from the dead, and confess with your mouth that Jesus is the lord of your life (meaning you surrender control to him) that you will inherit the kingdom of God.
Being a christian is by no means easy or by no means takes away all your problems. Christ came to give us life more abundantly, and that He does. I've had more and greater problems in the three years i have been a christian. but on the same not, i've never in my life felt this much joy, felt so complete. been so sure of anything, even my own hands being attached to my arms. i have a faith that outweighs everything that's been thrown at me in life. i encourage anyone who reads this.... God said that if you seek after him with your whole heart, you will find him. i've been to the entire other side of the spectrum concerning gods and religions. there is nothing else out there. someone seeking only to glorify and fulfill themselves is only doomed to failure and hurt. alexander the great wept bitterly when he found out he had no more worlds to conquer.
All i can say to you is that God is there. he's longing for you to turn to him. so much so that he sent a perfect sacrifice for us, so that all we have to do is give him our hearts and follow him. not adhere to a strict set of legalistic rules. Christ said "He who loves me will follow my commandments." when asked what the greatest commandment was, he stated that it was first and foremost to love God with all your heart, mind and strength. the second greatest commandment: love your neighbor as i have loved you. that's about all i have to say.
please, email me. instant message me. ask me questions, i love to find the answers, if i don't have them.
may God bless you all, and may you find hope and love in Him.
~Casey

dedpoetic @ 2003-05-07T14:25:00

2003-05-07T19:26:46Z

not much is goin on here.
just got home from work. my old roommate fred is in town. we went to sioux falls and saw an AWESOME show last night. Spoken played. they're just awesome and cool guys. anyway, i'm tired. i've had 15 plays on my mp3.com account in the past two days. Rock on!
~Casey

dedpoetic @ 2003-05-02T02:24:00

2003-05-02T07:24:41Z

She's There

i'm giving up on heart conditions
and loath the days of expectation
she only visits for a second
and leaves a nightmare for my soul
i prayed that God would end this torture
but now i fear to shut my eyes

but in my head she's there
i kick myself,recall her name
but in my head i know
she wanted me but i'm alone

i only dwell on formal glories
relive the best days of my life
but i refused to take her offer
she wept and somehow found the door

but in my head she's there
i kick myself, recall her name
but in my head i know
she wanted me but i'm alone

she's in my head...and i'll bring you home, clean all my mistakes
what's done is done, and it goes on and on and on